Show me the MONEY!

So, here I sit at my desk, contemplating whether or not I should purchase this really cheap ticket to Vegas. It'd be sort of a birthday gift to myself--twenty-two years on this Earth and I've never even been to the wild west! Let's weigh the options: I'm somewhat of a realist, so I like to start with the cons and see how the pros stack up to them..

Here it goes: Vegas is more of a man's city, where former jocks and frat boys gather to throw themselves bachelor parties, which usually entail three-day long binges that involve strippers and vodka, namely Grey Goose or Belvedere ('cuz they're ballers, like that). Obviously, I'm no frat boy, so these things bear little interest to me. I don't hate on strippers, because a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, and I'd like to think that most of these bright, young women are simply paying off student loans with their toplessness. Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm just trying to restore some faith in humanity.

Secondly, I hate buffets and their promise of all you can eat. I don't like the thought of food lying around in the open-air, where bacteria and disease mutate and multiply by the dozens. Mind you, all-you-can-eat sushi sounds appetizing, and I am getting fed-up with artificial crab (aka "pollack"). The heat seems unbearable, too. I'm a bit of a hypochondriac, so naturally the fear of sun-stroke scares me; fainting in some foreign place, with drunk, incapable people hovering all around me wondering if I’m dead or something is not my idea of a good time. But, I'm all pasty and white and unlike most Canadians, I can actually tan, without looking like I hopped off of the Jersey Shore bandwagon.

Pros: I think it would be a birthday to remember (or, if all goes as planned, not remember). There are certainly some great shows in Vegas, too bad Celine isn't around anymore, belting out tunes I can hear on Canadian radio fourteen times a day. Siegfried and Roy do sound pretty entertaining. I like their German accents and being all toasty like George Hamilton. Unfortunately, I'm not a fan of cats, so I might sit near the rafters, pumped up on a bunch of allergy meds, for fear of being eaten or sneezing myself into oblivion. There's lots of celeb watching that can be done, if you count the Kardashians and Paris Hilton as A-listers. Maybe I'll be able to get into some D-List pool party at Wet Republic for someone like Avril Lavigne or Brody Jenner. Also! Being a high-roller comes pretty cheap, I found a schveet suite overlooking the strip for under 50$ (Canadian!) per night. And if I play my cards wisely, I might get upgraded to penthouse. You know, with the big beds that are made for extremely gigantic basketball players and are equipped with bowling alleys? Nice.

But I'm not one to be taking a chance, as you can surely tell; I'm more of a pessimist (or, as mentioned earlier on, a "realist"). So, gambling at a craps table and letting some dice decide my financial fate isn't really my thang. I'm no Dustin Hoffman in "Rain Man," so the likelihood of my Vegas winnings are slim to none. I like the idea of governing my own destiny and rationally, meticulously, determining my expenses. Now, partaking in an auction is more up my alley because I still feel the adrenaline while remaining in total control and, most importantly, the rewards are always greater than none. What better feeling is there than to walk away with more than you started with? Who knows, maybe after tuning into Bid For Cash a few nights in a row I'll be able to take that (much needed) vacation after all!

Game-on!

PARANORMAL TEXTIVITY?

My apologies for not having written sooner. I’ve been so spooked by the incidents that have occurred lately that I didn’t have the guts to tell anyone about it. Now I’ve safely assumed that there is either a ghost following me or I’ve watched too many horror flicks for my own good and am therefore going crazy! But all of that aside, I hope everyone had a fun Halloween!

Anyways, all my spookiness started on the 30th. It was the night before Halloween and I was working late in the office. I decided to take a break after hitting the 12-hour mark and picked up an espresso from the Italian deli next door. Once I got back to my desk, I remembered that the camera from last night’s Halloween party was still in my bag and thought that it’d be fun to go through the pictures and post them on Facebook. Maybe I was tired, maybe I smudged the lens with chocolaty fingers, or MAYBE I just have a terrible camera, BUT there was DEFINITELY something up with the photos. Not just one or two accidental snap shots, but each and every picture I was in featured a dark shadow above my left shoulder. EACH AND EVERY PICTURE. WTF?! I didn’t know what to do; I was alone in an office with a cold draft, minimal lighting and heard weird sounds from the air vents. SO… in a frightened panic… I deleted all the photos!

(On a side note: My friends are peeved they don’t have any tagged pictures)

THEN, to make matters worse, and just as I was getting over the whole "dark shadows" debacle, I get a text message “from the future.” Yes, the future. OK, here’s what happened: it’s Wednesday and I’m celebrating happy hour with a group of friends (like every week since January) and my phone vibrates on the table. The text is blank, from a phone number I do not recognize and, get this, with a date received that reads: December 5th, 2019 at 11:49PM. MAJOR WTF?! As soon as I get home, I go online and start researching what this means (if it means anything at all). I come across “paranormal” forums and find out that multiple people across North America have received similar texts with dates “received” which are all within the month of December 2019 and minutes before midnight. Believers think these are “text messages from the future,” but I’m skeptical. At this point, I don’t know what to believe anymore.

What do you think? Was I caught in a series of strange circumstances? Am I over analyzing? Has this ever happened to you? (Please say yes so that I’m not crazy)

I’ll tell you what I will do though, I’m totally calling http://mystic.eso.tv (check ‘em out at 9am and 1pm every day on TXT-TV) to see if they have any answers for me!

Q&A With The Ladies Behind SXT IT UP

Last Sunday I had a brunch date with the femmes of SXT IT UP. It was the first time we’ve been together outside of work and I must admit I was quite nervous. These women are even hotter in person! I’ve never seen so many men (and angry girlfriends) staring, but after countless cups of coffee and heaps of pancakes, our afternoon rendez-vous was quite fun! We chatted about all things under the sun, from our personal lives to their new roles as TXT-TV hosts ...some things were so risqué I’ve been sworn to secrecy, but here’s what flew under the radar:

How did you get started with TXT-TV?

Cher: Two words: Interviews and auditions. By the fourth interview I didn’t know what I was getting myself into, like, was I applying to become a CIA operative or TV host?

Dom: Yeah, same here. I remember seeing Cher in the lobby during my first interview–she must have been my good luck charm!

Dez: I know a lot of people in the entertainment industry, so a friend told me about the position but it was very confidential. People had no idea where I would run off to for weeks until the first show aired!

Cher reveals that she's secretly addicted to Twitter, Facebook & texting.

Were your friends shocked to find out you were hosts of a show called SXT IT UP?

(The girls look at each other and laugh)

Dom: My brothers were nervous their friends would find out–they didn’t want them “sexualizing” me. I’m a homebody, so I guess it was kinda shocking, but this job lets me come out of my shell. Plus, I can’t think of a better way to earn money while in still school!

Cher: Man, I wish I had this job when I was in college! My friends don’t quite understand the concept of the show, they just say “Cher’s a TV star” which isn’t anywhere near true, but I don’t feel like explaining for the umpteenth time what my role is. 

Dez: My friends thought this was perfect for me. I’m a sexy, social butterfly! 

Cher: It might come as a surprise to you, but even though I’m not a big party girl and enjoy being curled up on the couch, this show suits me ‘cuz I’m encouraged to own my sexuality.

You’re all so different, but there’s great chemistry here. Why do you think that is?

Dom: I don’t have any sisters, so they’re like my older sisters.

Cher: Meaning we give her terrible advice about boys.

Dez: ...and girls!

Dom admits she was a tomboy, but is now having fun exploring her girly side.

Some people think that it’s empowering to be open about sex and sexuality, but others disagree. What sets SXT IT UP apart from other TV shows?

Dez: The audience is a major part of the show!

Dom: Yeah, they determine what directions we’ll go in and how far the envelope will be pushed each night.

Dez: You know, there’s nothing wrong with fulfilling your fantasies. In fact, I like it because we become a part of their lives! 

Dom: You can’t compare SXT IT UP with other TV shows. They’re all the same and so predictable, whereas SXT IT UP is constantly evolving, thanks to the viewers!

Dez: Oh! And the news is just depressing!

Are you able to have romantic relationships when your job is to sxt and flirt with other people?

Cher: It’s difficult to find somebody in general let alone someone who is comfortable with sharing you, but I’m definitely on the market and dating a few people.

Dom: That’s true. What I like about this job more than working at a bar or wherever is that I have my anonymity. My fantasies and relationships don’t follow me home, unless I want them to.

Dez loves to enjoy herself and has a lot of vices.

Are you saying you haven’t been recognized?

Dom: No, the Dominique that goes to school and plays hockey with her brothers doesn’t have the hair and make-up you see on TV.

Dez: I’ve been recognized a few times, but that’s ‘cuz I’ve modeled here and there for years. They don’t know my name, but men approach me with the “have we met before” line all the time!

What do you hope viewers take away from SXT IT UP?

Dez: I hope they have fun and want to come back for more!

Dom: The playful vibe is key! I love PM’ing because we can take the conversation to a whole other level that can’t be done on TV.

Cher: For some people, SXT IT UP is like foreplay, and we’re happy to help. For others, we form these unique relationships. It all depends on what the viewer is looking for, but I like to think that we’re realizing people’s fantasies and helping them to move one step closer to the person they want to become.

BEHIND-THE-SCENES AT TXT-TV: AFTER HOURS!

Summer’s over, but TXT-TV is still in full swing!

You might be wondering, “Mods, don’t you have friends or a life to enjoy?” Well, the answer is yes - of course we do. There were barbecues and beer-pong tournaments that were missed out on because we were holed up in TXT-TV HQ, but I don’t regret a single shift.

Working late nights can be stressful and boring, but not at TXT-TV! Honestly, it’s a party in the MCR as soon as the office clears out. Did the former blogger tell you how HQ feels more like an arcade than a work place? There’s a [childproof] dartboard, catch-it-cone (fun!), an oversized blue monkey (which has been put in ...um, compromising positions) and (my personal fave) a poster of the office mustache competition in its full glory.

Obviously, we take our work seriously and try to deliver the best programming, so these toys and decorations are only played with and admired during our breaks. It just so happens that the International Fireworks Competition would set-off during the 10:30PM trivia shows (i.e. break time!) and we got the best view in the city from HQ’s 6th-story window. Seeing the sky light up could make us wish we were outside enjoying the summer weather and drinking mojitos on a rooftop bar, but your texts kept us well-entertained all through the night. Sometimes they were so good (read: dirrty) we wouldn’t dare put them on live television, but boy did we have fun reading them!

The one magic word during our late-night shift is: CAFFEINE.

Lucky for us, HQ is well stocked in that department. We have this fancy coffee maker that we load up with robust beans called “Midnight Express” that kicks sleepiness out the window and welcomes insomnia with open arms. Once the caffeine is pumping through our veins, a new wave of wired excitement rushes through the MCR and music begins to play. These tunes are not only essential for our sanity, but for getting us in the right mood to work at our full potential. Mood is very important and dictates the vibe of each show; Marvin Gaye doesn’t exactly jibe with “My Life Sux,” but goes swimmingly with the “Sxt It Up” action! We’ve discovered a few gems (check out: Grooveshark and stereomood) which you could use for your personal enjoyment and can stream online for FREE!

All of this to say, late nights at TXT-TV are filled with fun and excitement! So, JOIN THE PARTY! Be sure to check out the revamped version of “SXT It Up” starting every night at 11PM with your new (sexy!) hosts Cher, Dez and Dom!

New Kid In Town

As our loyal readers know, our resident blogger has bid farewell to TXT-TV. On behalf of the team, we wish him all the best in his future endeavors and know that his wit and humour will bring him great success.

Please bear with me ladies and gentlemen, because I have big shoes to fill (literally!). I’ve been working as a TXT-TV moderator for the past six months and have gotten to know our texters quite well, but now I’m excited to get my hands dirty and engage with you on this entirely different platform!

Like my esteemed predecessor, I’ll be operating from the front lines of TXT-TV, so be prepared for more inside scoops and direct access to behind-the-scenes action than you can handle! Our station is constantly evolving—and believe me, this blog will keep pace with all of the exciting changes! Not only will you get to know your new blogger (me!), you’ll also meet members of the TXT-TV team as they contribute future blog posts!

There’s never a dull moment at TXT-TV HQ, especially when you’re building a television channel, so climb aboard (read: follow this blog!) and join us as we continue to go boldly where no channel has gone before!

I’d also like to know who you are, so don’t be shy to comment or ask questions.

Stay tuned ‘cuz the best is yet to come!!

On the Road Again

So, it’s been a little while now hasn’t it…

The last little while has been pretty eventful, more than I could really have ever imagined. Me and a buddy got jumped outside a bar (we’re fine – the other guys not so much ;-), I got to house-sit my best friend’s super funky apartment in an uber cool neighbourhood and, for the last four days, have experienced the ungodly wrath of a stomach flu that kept coming back for more.

With all of that going on, it was quite by accident that I found myself getting a new job.

So, I guess this is goodbye. But I’ve always preferred until we meet again…

Sometimes that’s just life – you fall ass backwards into something you didn’t even know you could do, and it fits and the stars and planets align and you say, well coincidence or not, something’s up here. Sure, its surreal – some would say synchronicity. I don’t believe in such things, but I’ve always appreciated the plot twists on the road.

So, it is with much regret that I bid you all adieu and move on to a new experience. 

Having documented TXT-TV on its way up from what was little more than an idea several months ago to a fully-fledged network has been very exciting to say the very least. But most of all, it was a real treat to work with all the fine people here behind the scenes. They know who they are and they’re all good people, it was indeed a pleasure getting to know them. It was fascinating and challenging, and ultimately quite a rewarding experience all around.

As I leave TXT-TV, I leave confident this network is in very capable hands, because when you enjoy what you do it’s effortless, and I don’t think I had ever seen a place where people went to work so at ease, so comfortably. It definitely caught the eye.

Long may you run…

Touchdown Chowdown Touches Down

So, as some of you doubtlessly remember from having read and carefully annotated all of my previous blog posts, we recently ran a Reverse Auction contest called Touchdown Chowdown. This was a contest that ran for a month where viewers and texters like you texted in bids in hopes of coming out at the end of the contest, with the lowest, unique bid and therefore, winning the contest. Many of you loyal viewers/testers played and interest was high enough to merit continued examination of whether such a program will be feasible in the future.

In case you were wondering, someone did win this inaugural Reverse Auction contest, right here on TXT-TV. 

Last Thursday, Neil L. from Scorborough, Ontario, and a friend drove down to Montreal as part of the Touchdown Chowdown grand prize, which included 2 primo tickets to see the Argos take on the Als at the newly renovated Molson Stadium, 2 nights accommodation at the Hotel du Fort, a gas card to get from Scarborough to Montreal and back, and last but not least, $500 worth of eats and drinks at some of Montreal’s finest pubs, including: McKibbins Irish Pub, PJ O’Hara’s, Ziggy’s Pub and the Irish Embassy.

We trust that Neil and his friend had a blast in Montreal and remind you, my faithful readers, to stay tuned to TXT-TV for more Reveres Auction contests – you never know, you could be our next winner!

The Unforgettable Fire (Burning Down the House)

Before continuing – I want to welcome a long lost mod back to the fold. He had to leave us for some time but now finds himself caught up in the warm, fuzzy embrace of a nascent TV network. Considering he hasn’t been here pretty much since the beginning, I can only imagine just how radically different everything is (don’t worry – he’ll catch up by reading this blog post!)

So, on with the show...

Unfortunately, high pressure text shows such as our own, where the desire to be eloquent meets the realities of quick typing, often leads to people seeming to come close to bursting a gasket. Such was the state of affairs a few days ago as we became inundated with all forms of inflammatory rhetoric. The users were first timers and gave us the impression they were working as a team.

And I’m all like – what? Convo-baiters and text trolls are now working in cahoots?

Has the world gone loco? The answer to the aforementioned – No, it’s the children who are wrong…

Ok, fine – call me on it why don’t you – that was Principal Skinner – a lot of our loyal viewers use Simpson’s quotes and images as their avatars, who am I to stop the runaway freight-train of pop culture? Anyways – it looks like we’ll be dealing with trolls for some time, and I guess we’ll just have to get used to it.

A big element of the job is to assist people in getting the full appreciation and utility of the network, which is partially a text/chat/open forum conversation generator, but also serves to create and develop highly personalized fantasies.  

Consider: the avatars, the nicknames, the personalities – even what’s being said may come in a form you’d never associate with the actual person doing the texting. And why not? People need to escape and not all of us will live the life of that Dos Equis Guy (stay thirsty my friend…) So TXT-TV can and does allow its users to develop virtual extensions of themselves for entertainment purposes. Hell, some people have been able to use TXT-TV to meet new people and develop friendships.

I suppose I’ll leave you with a reminder, that TXT-TV is entertainment, but rest assured, it’s always in our interest to ensure you have a thoroughly enjoyable experience. 

We learn quickly from our beloved texters – you keep us on our toes!

Trolls: They’re doing it for the Lulz (Part 3)

So, a few days back we mods discover what can only be described as Trolls-in-Concert. Multiple texts coming in from various different texters sporting different nicknames, spelling out lurid sex acts and proposing extremely offensive discussion topics. 

It was, in its own right, a breath of fresh air – usually the trolling happens sporadically, this was the first instance of collaborative trolling we had experienced.

It was further complicated by the fact that one of the users had a pre-approved nickname that ought to have raised alarms before it was approved. This can happen, especially when you’re sorting through hundreds of nicknames and profile pics that all require diligent consideration. What can I say – TXT-TV is getting more and more popular every day.

Now keep in mind, rules about vulgarity change around 11pm, and as any devotee of our late-night programming can attest, raunch certainly abounds on TXT-TV ‘after the lights go out’. Most of this is harmless and playful, fun without being creepy or offensive. It’s a necessary concession, similar in principle to the un-written rule about public-drinking (keep it in a brown paper bag and don’t act like a fool) – there needs to be a time when the strictures of the established rules are relaxed – it’s a give and take thing.

Moreover, its not like we’re a bunch of prudes either. 

We all dig on the raunch, the offensive, the limits of comedy and trying to figure out where the line lies. A tendency in broadcast media I’ve noticed is that the people behind the scenes and the people at the mic over-compensate for what they’re not allowed to say on air when they’re off the air. A cousin of mine is the morning DJ for a local radio station – he curses a blue streak, real sailor styles, whenever the mic is turned off. On air, he’s a real sweetheart – the kind of guy you’d think nothing of introducing to your conservative grandparents.

Regardless, we find ourselves delighted by the attempts of the numerous trolls if for no other reason than it has become functionally taboo for us – we love it even more when it has a hint of subtlety or cleverness to it. But alas, the work of the obvious troll is easy to spot and habitually will never make it to air. 

I want the trolls to know their work is widely appreciated by the mods, despite the fact it will never see the light of day. Try harder if you must, but be aware we’re paid to be hyper vigilant. It may seem paradoxical, but it isn’t inherently hypocritical, and at the end of the day that’s all that really matters.

Trolls: They’re doing it for the Lulz (Part 2)

So, with all that jazz about social taboos and offensive subject matter, I can tell you it's left the mods in a bit of peculiar and paradoxical situation. Consider it – we’re all twenty-somethings living in the big city. We’re from a wide-range of different cultural backgrounds and have, for the most part, grown up in open, inclusive, multi-cultural societies. In essence, we’re very aware of social sensitivities; they’ve been bred into our subconscious by years of public education and public service announcements aimed squarely at us. 

As young children, the endless messages were beamed right into our heads: play nice, accept others, differences are what make us individually unique, celebrate diversity etc.

I don’t mean to be flippant – clearly this is vital, nay crucial for a society such as our own. However, when I say it was beamed into our heads, please take this as literally as possible. Hell, go a step further: it was drilled into the very essence of our beings.

That being said, we were also raised, as I previously mentioned, by the titans of off-colour comedy. Being from the Internet Age as we are, the adolescent tendency towards rebellion often manifests itself in the youth taking an avid interest in the realm of taboo, and the performers who test the limits of what’s considered appropriate and what issues can be satirized for comedic, perhaps even oddly educational, effect. Comedians like Dennis Leary, Chris Rock, Mitch Hedberg, Bill Hicks, David Cross and Dave Chapelle are largely responsible for really pushing the limits of offensive comedy, but underlying the curses, scatology and perversions lay a wealth of social truths. Satire is mainstream nowadays, as any devotee of Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart or Conan O’Brien would tell you. Consider the content of programs such as Arrested Development or 30 Rock – both mainstream, prime-time programming, and ask yourself if you think you could say the same thing on a mainstream Canadian network at the same time. Ask yourself if any of these comedians or programs could have survived the social censors of the last generation – a mere thirty years ago.

At the end of the day, what you need to realize is that while a bankable comedian can test the limits of vulgarity for effect, the average TXT-TV viewer probably shouldn’t. 

After all, that’s why those comedians are called ‘bankable’. What they say has monetary consequences for their sponsors, the networks, the advertisers etc. As professional performers they have a very good idea of where the very thin line lies, and when they tap-dance all over it, they risk everything. There’s a school of thought, perpetuated by the devotees of the Andy Kauffman school of comedy, that suggest that Michael Richard’s racist nightclub rantings of a few years back may in fact have been an act, maybe even a staged act. 

All I know is that Kramer crossed a line – nay, leaped over a line – and his career will never recover.

How this relates to Trolls is as follows. Regular people feel that they too can push the boundaries of vulgarity and taboo, and the anonymity of the Internet Age only makes the would-be troll more comfortable in pursuing their mischievous aims. Trolling can take on almost any form, happen anywhere people gather to exchange views and opinions, and can range from mere name-calling and shit-disturbing to in-your-face ambush interviews (and, suffice it to say, everything in between).

Trolling was an issue all Mods had to deal with starting on day one of our training as we carefully dissected what would be considered appropriate submissions for nicknames, profile pics, content submissions for the individual programs etc. 

On the first day we aired we were confronted almost immediately with people who were trying to flood our system with pornographic images, vulgar nicknames and a steady flow of provocative, explicit and otherwise offensive messages.

After more than three months, it still happens, and as we’ve been gaining more viewers and more attention, it is unlikely to cease any time soon.

Trolls: They’re doing it for the Lulz (Part 1)

So we’ve encountered a problem with trolling. It is both infuriating and, at times, fiendishly amusing. 

What a catch-22 for a moderator!

Here’s the deal for the uninitiated: a Troll in common webspeak parlance is an individual who stirs shit with a single goal in mind. They’re their own personal amusement at your enraged, befuddled, jaw-dropped expense. These are the people in high school who would fart as loud as they could in the middle of a lecture just to wake the people up around them. The types who years earlier ate worms to gross out female classmates in the elementary schoolyard; a healthy breed of oddball sociopaths who gets “lulz” at your expense. "Lulz" incidentally is a bastardization of the term “lol”; it is as if lol was written by the cats from lolcats and conjugated in the style developed by the Cheeseburger Network 

(If you don’t know, Google it on your iPhone – welcome to the future…)

A troll can take on many forms. Initially it applied to people who would write asinine and provocative comments on Internet message boards, such as newspaper and broadcaster websites, though at present no one is safe from trolling, and indeed everyone who runs a website with a message board is all too aware of these sick, hilarious people. Often quite contrarian -almost to an absurd degree, the common troll is looking to get you enraged, though he may or may not believe in what he’s writing, saying, hell – maybe even singing. He’s out to get your goat, as it were.

Who is a troll? 

Glenn Beck is most likely a troll, and he has a syndicated radio show, not to mention a very popular infotainment program on Fox News Channel. In fact, he’s probably the most recognizable example of pure troll. Because he does it for the lulz.

Here at TXT-TV, the Mods have been encountering a problem with trolling. 

Individuals send in all kinds of obscene messages, which due to various provincial and federal regulations we are prohibited from airing before 11pm. Moreover, there’s a bevy of other terms, words and phrases that for obvious reasons, can never air on Canadian TV. This would include, among other things, hate-speech,  racism, libel and a wide range of cultural and social taboos. 

As moderators, it’s our job to filter through the messages sent in and, in effect, censor those that violate the myriad rules concerning what’s appropriate for national television. This is a complicated, subjective and context-dependent problem for us to solve, and getting a specific consensus on how to deal with a problem that is inherently personal is even more complicated. 

Thankfully, we have the benefit of working in teams, and this often leads to two or three-way discussions on meaning, intent and context. 

It’s fascinating in its own right, and you tend to learn a fair deal about how people deal with taboos when they consider offensive statements in an objective fashion. It’s not easy, and we’re reminded constantly that the individual message has cost someone money. 

Caution is the name of the game.

Continuation Continued?

The evaluations have been hanging over our heads like the Sword of Damocles (don’t be lazy – wiki-it!) for a few weeks now. We dread it for all the same reasons everyone dreads being evaluated – the fear of a personal attack or of a denigrating comment leaving an especially nasty mark, one which throws your worldview into chaos and makes you question the very essence of your being.

Or, y’know, get pissed off and go out drinking until you can’t remember what it was you were upset about in the first place. Makes the world go round y’know?

Regardless of how we deal with the criticism, I find it hard to believe any of us will be judged overly harshly. Everyone seems to be enjoying their job and their colleagues' company. The group is gelling well and everyone seems legitimately interested not only in keeping their jobs, but seeing where this network is going to go, what the future holds (ouch – just realized that’s in a TXT-TV promo; been hearing that line too often I guess).

It’s a legit feeling of interest; three months in and a bond's been formed; didn’t take very long either before it got solid – these are important considerations from the mod’s perspective: a decent job is one thing, but good company at the job, the kind that naturally leads to collaboration and idea development, that’s crucial for high morale. 

Morale seems to be the single most important currency for young people in a massive city during a recession – for what’s good pay worth if you’re miserable where you work? Maybe it’s a generational thing – my parents and their ilk, the boomers, can’t fathom why so many of us urban bohemian types judge jobs by whether they keep us happy in and of themselves, as opposed to the scales of pay and their bizarre Consumerist-Happiness associations. Oh well, I’m having a difficult enough time just wrapping my head around the world we live in; that issue will have to wait for another day.

The feelings of dread are palpable though; no one wants to be judged too harshly – and there’s a reason for that too. As the children of the boomers, we were told since day one – each and every one of us, how special and beautiful and righteous and great and amazing we all were (are). Not only re-enforced by our parents, but the education system, television and media in general, years worth of NFB shorts and YTV reminding us of how special we all are. 

Turns out we youngsters bought it hook line and sinker back then and I think we’re not the best at handling criticism as a result. Whatever, Bert and Ernie never judged us…

Seriously though, I think we’ll be okay and there’s not a whole helluva lot to worry about. Part of ‘the dread’ stems from the fact that we’re the first batch of moderators; we’re the first group to go through the training, and we all came into this thing together. An element of this ‘fear’ is partially explained by the fact that we’re, in essence, making this up as we go along, sorting through problems and quandaries as they come up, often in a communal fashion. We owe our success to each other, and we seem to be succeeding together... 

So what – me worry?

We’re Not Calling it Team Building

So, it has been about three months that we’ve all been working here at TXT-TV. A few faces have disappeared off the face of the planet, while those that remain become more and more familiar, friendly. 

Bonds are being formed and we’re even getting to know one another more intimately; after all, we’re in it to win it, and we’re in it together too.

Example – we’re all getting a good idea about each other’s relationship status, gossiping about one person’s annoying boyfriend and getting all excited about another moving in with their long-term girlfriend. It’s a kind of local currency, one you’ll find in just about any work environment. If you’re doing it right, people open up to you, let loose and discuss what it is that makes them who they are – problems and all.

So, what do we do for each other to cultivate our bonds of friendship? 

Well, a few weeks back, one of the moderators had the brilliant idea to get a pool going so we could treat one of the team leaders to a fancy supper on his birthday. His hard work and dedication are inspiring to say the least, and we all thought getting him and his girl a night on the town was an ideal present. Suffice it to say it was definitely well appreciated and they both had an excellent time. It’s the little things like this that keep the bonds of the team strong. 

This isn’t your typical corporate team building exercise – believe me I’ve been through those before, they’re terrible, and I can’t imagine anyone at TXT-TV wants to do that idiotic exercise where you fall into another person’s arms. 

Quick sidebar – given my weight and height, when I fall, very few people are running to catch me, prepared or not...

See, good team building has to be organic. A solid team working to accomplish any given task or goal has to bond together for its own reasons, not because they feel obliged to.

The Luck of the Carefully Thought Out Draw

So what are we interested in here at TXT-TV you may ask? Well, I can tell you what we're interested in: your happiness. 

I know, I know, schmaltz right? But it’s true, and a few days back we made one lucky TXT-TV viewer a whole lot happier. That’s right. Neil L. of Scarborough, Ontario is the winner of the inaugural Lowest Bid Standing reverse auction contest, Touchdown Chowdown! 

He and a friend have won tickets to see the Argonauts take on the Alouettes at the newly renovated Molson Stadium in beautiful downtown Montreal. They will stay at the luxurious Hotel du Fort and, of course, not have to worry about transportation or food and drinks - we're also covering that.

It’s just a little way for us to say thank you to our wonderful viewers.

Now if you’re starting to get all teary eyed because you think you’ve somehow missed the boat on TXT-TV contests,  Lowest Bid Standing, or LBS as we have hiply called it, is in development as a whole new regular program on TXT-TV. As a reverse auction, the winner is the individual with the lowest unique bid on any given item.  Strange? Yes! Financially tenable? Maybe! Waste of time? Absolutely not, just ask Neil Ledger, the first winner of our innaugural Lowest Bid Standing reverse auction contest!

Lowest Bid Standing will be coming to the TXT-TV airwaves soon enough in a whole new format, allowing all of our loyal viewers the opportunity to win cold, hard cash!

Think of LBS as yet another way to win, simply by watching and participating in TXT-TV, Canada’s most interactive television network.

Where the Vuvuzelas Won’t Work

If you’re a red blooded Canadian like myself, a connoisseur of hockey, beavers, great open expanses of raw natural beauty and, of course, poutine, double-doubles and bison burgers, then you know one thing with absolute certainty – the Vuvuzela is an African knock off of the Hockey Horn.

That’s right, I’m claiming the Vuvuzela for Canada folks – if you’ve ever played peewee hockey in Canada, you know what a Hockey Horn is – it’s usually accompanied by shrieking mothers, rattles and as many video cameras as the trembling hands of the parents gathered can hold on to. But alas, what with Chicago’s beautiful Curse of Muldoon (look it up) ending Stanley Cup victory a few weeks back, there’s no hockey to watch, and little to play.

So then what do we do with a show like Road to the Cup, one of our best, and most watched, programs ever? D’uh – we re-formulate it for the purposes of the World Cup!

That’s right – we have soccer (football) fever – and we’re going to be tearing up the virtual pitch by offering you Road to the Cup; the World Cup edition - the fastest paced, lowest scoring, passing-intensive specialty sports chat show we’ve ever had!

But will there be any Vuvuzelas you might be asking?

Absolutely not! Considering that we can’t hear you, and no one’s going to bother spending a quarter texting in ‘bahzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz’, we can offer you all the excitement of a Mexican sports-caster without the annoying cacophony of a stadium filled with proto-trumpet players!

And wait – if that’s not awesome enough – I can personally guarantee you we will stop all other programming for MOD messages that read: gooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllllllllll!

The world’s sport is now in its cup mode, and no one cares about cups like us. 

 We don’t just use them as containers for various liquids, we also enjoy hoisting them up over our heads! The whole wide world is watching the elegant ballet of the third most important sporting event of the year, and you can get in on the ground-floor with all the soccer related chatting and texting you can imagine. The awesome number of lazy-boy refs and couch-surfing soccer jocks will make your eyes tear up in utter joy as you discover just how little you actually know about this amazing, death defying sport!

Road to the Cup (Soccer Edition) premiers Wednesday June 23^rd 2010 at 6:30 pm, and will air nightly at this time until the end of the competition. Enjoy watching TXT-TV!

Mood Altering & Mind Bending

So, yesterday, after over three months of work here at TXT-TV, I found myself working with another moderator with whom I’ve never worked. 

We had a good time, and as always I learned even more about how this place works, what the concerns are, what other mods think etc. There’s been a lot of buzz going on in the office.

The last few weeks seem to have seen a real upsurge in use, and a decent back and forth conversation has taken place more often than I can count. It’s odd comparing it to way back in the day when we just started out, since everything was a little stilted back then. People didn’t even seem to try to make that much sense y’know? Now we’re breaking usage records, and from what my moderation associates tell me, the overnight stretch is exactly where you want to be. Polite conversation prevents me from delving too deeply into its content, perhaps the teaser could be simply this; TXT-TV – after 11, it’s not polite!

Ahhh, in a previous life I was an ad executive at a high-powered Madison Avenue advertising agency; I was Dick Whitman…

What else to report on?

Well, as far as the program Road to the Cup is concerned, we’re still on the road, but we’re going after a different cup. That’s right, scream "Goal!" as long and as loud as you can, because we are taking it to the streets and looking for your hot, tempting opinions and ideas to help us get through the cosmic ballet that is international football competitions. Get out your Vuvuzela and blare it at your TV screen for maximum effect!

And on the note of international football competitions and their effect on Canadians, the following was related to me by a relative who works in a very cosmopolitan university: “You see, in the first week of competition, everyone is happy that they can participate in this great international equalizer – a similar sentiment as you’d have with the Olympics during the opening ceremonies. The second week, people start getting a tad defensive, a few off the cuff remarks, jokes etc. By the third week, people begin talking about how superior their nations are in relation to other countries. Everything is polite up until the final week, up until the point when it becomes obvious who’s going to battle it out for the big win. At that point, all you hear is one group calling the other ‘fascists’”.

Talk about hitting the nail on the head eh?

The First Rule of TXT-TV

So, we had an interesting last few days I can report on.

There’s been a whole new buzz here. 

We launched a bunch of revamped commercials and interstitials (the station call-sign, usually only a few milliseconds, now in glorious full-screen action), quickly followed by the deliveries of the first round of TXT-TV swag – stickers and Technicolor t-shirts; a must for any fashionista this summer!

Next came an interesting moderator-wide email reminding us to exercise a bit of caution (or at least some rudimentary research skills) when handling topic and issue suggestions from our loyal viewers. Turns out one of the subjects recently sent in to an episode of My Life Sux was in fact posted to another website recently. 

But it wasn't one of our intrepid leaders who caught this - it was one of you - our loyal viewers.

Some of us have been trying to see what the limits are with regards to what we can post as topics, say to the public etc. It’s not in-house boundary pushing either – our myriad of bosses have made it abundantly clear what the boundaries are from within. No, what I’m talking about is more like whether or not you guys buy what we’re talking about. Clearly some of you do, since many of our topics elicit quite a fair bit of response. 

But some of you are super sharp, eyes like eagles etc. 

In my experience, I’ve had three unique texters tell me my facts were slightly off, or that a news story has changed since when I read it, and how something that may have been objectionable has in fact become acceptable due to new developments. 

Long story short, we’re all learning quite a bit from you guys.So keep it coming....

Quantum Leap

So yesterday I get the chance to see what all the recent hubbub’s been about. I know I’ve been regaling you with teasers about up-coming programs and the vagaries of the ‘change in the air’ – well, today I got a closure of sorts, though it felt far more like being catapulted into a whole new dimension.

And thus, a quantum leap.

TV networks casually go through multiple re-genesis, especially when they’re young. It’s casual because its to be expected, and truth be told, if there was one consistent message from top brass since we moderators got here, its been; “…expect change.”

So here we are, all gathered around one of the immense televisions strewn wildly throughout our office. Plastic inflatable couches, office chairs, folding chairs and the postures of those gathered round the screen reflect their position within the company. Management has its feat up, those most directly involved (i.e. – those who will work overnight to fix bugs) are standing, pacing, hunched over laptops, biting fingernails etc. The newbies, such as myself, stand at the back, quietly commenting on what’s going on as the detached observers we sometimes feel we are. We can’t quite grasp the full-on attention to detail paid by those on the production side of things.

Honestly, it’s not that different from being on a film set, which I had the great joy to experience a few years back. I remember how the producer and the director of photography carefully reviewed small segments of film in utter silence, constantly re-scanning what’s in front of them to pick out the slightest of errors.

Suffice it to say, things were a bit more jovial yesterday as we watched the new format, announcements, ‘interstitials’ (an industry term for a type of call-sign reminding you which channel you’re on and how it works, like a instructional commercial interspersed throughout each program, effectively breaking each show into parts) and general ‘feeling’ of a new improved version of TXT-TV. Think of what’s coming out over the next few weeks as TXT-TV 2.0 (I’m sure the production team probably see it as version 12 or 28 by this point).

It was something else, as I’m certain our loyal viewers will soon notice. Clean, sexy, dynamic and refreshing. 

It looks higher-produced and better pitched. Considering last Saturday we had our highest number of unique texters ever, I wonder what records might be broken next week, or the week after for that matter.

Let us know exactly what you think of the new format and/or anything else you want to tell us about.  

And remember, if you want your opinions to gain a little posterity, you can always comment on the blog – we here at TXT-TV are committed to a proactive approach with regards to user feedback and comments. They’re literally what keeps the internet running and relevant, so get it done.

Peace