Continuation Continued?

The evaluations have been hanging over our heads like the Sword of Damocles (don’t be lazy – wiki-it!) for a few weeks now. We dread it for all the same reasons everyone dreads being evaluated – the fear of a personal attack or of a denigrating comment leaving an especially nasty mark, one which throws your worldview into chaos and makes you question the very essence of your being.

Or, y’know, get pissed off and go out drinking until you can’t remember what it was you were upset about in the first place. Makes the world go round y’know?

Regardless of how we deal with the criticism, I find it hard to believe any of us will be judged overly harshly. Everyone seems to be enjoying their job and their colleagues' company. The group is gelling well and everyone seems legitimately interested not only in keeping their jobs, but seeing where this network is going to go, what the future holds (ouch – just realized that’s in a TXT-TV promo; been hearing that line too often I guess).

It’s a legit feeling of interest; three months in and a bond's been formed; didn’t take very long either before it got solid – these are important considerations from the mod’s perspective: a decent job is one thing, but good company at the job, the kind that naturally leads to collaboration and idea development, that’s crucial for high morale. 

Morale seems to be the single most important currency for young people in a massive city during a recession – for what’s good pay worth if you’re miserable where you work? Maybe it’s a generational thing – my parents and their ilk, the boomers, can’t fathom why so many of us urban bohemian types judge jobs by whether they keep us happy in and of themselves, as opposed to the scales of pay and their bizarre Consumerist-Happiness associations. Oh well, I’m having a difficult enough time just wrapping my head around the world we live in; that issue will have to wait for another day.

The feelings of dread are palpable though; no one wants to be judged too harshly – and there’s a reason for that too. As the children of the boomers, we were told since day one – each and every one of us, how special and beautiful and righteous and great and amazing we all were (are). Not only re-enforced by our parents, but the education system, television and media in general, years worth of NFB shorts and YTV reminding us of how special we all are. 

Turns out we youngsters bought it hook line and sinker back then and I think we’re not the best at handling criticism as a result. Whatever, Bert and Ernie never judged us…

Seriously though, I think we’ll be okay and there’s not a whole helluva lot to worry about. Part of ‘the dread’ stems from the fact that we’re the first batch of moderators; we’re the first group to go through the training, and we all came into this thing together. An element of this ‘fear’ is partially explained by the fact that we’re, in essence, making this up as we go along, sorting through problems and quandaries as they come up, often in a communal fashion. We owe our success to each other, and we seem to be succeeding together... 

So what – me worry?